The Three Things I Want to Have Sorted Out by This Time Five Years from Now
- What do I want to do with my future?
- Do I really want to start a family?
- Is Drake good?
I am an adult. I have heard my mom tell me the story of how she earned her beads during her vacation to New Orleans two weeks ago, and I am officially adult, I can leave all the granola bar wrappers I want in all the places I feel like leaving them, and that is officially a thing an adult does.
Anonymous said: I really like winnie the pooh, Can you draw winnie the pooh pleaseeeeee
arby’s why is your slogan WE HAVE THE MEATS
i’m worried about you
i’m worried about the things you have chosen to do arby’s
Like, other sports have homoerotic underpinnings, but other sports also feature athletes like Glen “Big Baby” Davis, Bartolo Colon, and every offensive lineman in positions of prominence. Watching American Ninja Warrior has made me question things I never thought I would have to question much farther than I already had. Like, the summer I’ve spent with American Ninja Warrior has bumped me to a 3 on the Kinsey scale.
I don’t know if I’m just ecstatic to be playing a video game on my television that was released after I graduated high school, but Super Paper Mario is A RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF FUN like just all the things are in this game and it’s beautiful
~Liana, who I made to look like she was saying GURRRRRRRL all the time
~Caralin, of whom I am very proud
~Nega Bob, of whom I am the second-most proud
HELLO, TUCSON! This is Waffle Marathon! We know you guys are waiting to hear “That Magic Touch (Fingers),” but ah, we’re gonna kick things off with a little rock sing-a-long. So if any of you out there know the words, feel free to rock out with us. This one’s called “Lost My Car, Found My Girl.”
Like, there’s watermelon Chobani now? And my goodness, that is one of the few foods I wouldn’t mind being the last thing I ever ate. Like, if I die while eating, I want it to be during:
~Ben & Jerry’s milk and cookies ice cream
~Peanut butter sandwich (nothing fancy, not the green apple/sriracha/pb sandwich I grew fond of, just straight peanut butter)
~Waffle marathon (I want to die of unrelated causes while eating the first three and have a waffle marathon be what kills me.)
dad why did you self-comment a lyric video for the rob thomas/santana collaboration “smooth” under one of your photos
dad i worry about you a lot sometimes
I’m glad that this year we have a hit summer single in which a man asks for permission before he gets with a woman. I… Well, I’m sure we all wish that he were asking for her permission, not her father’s, but, y’know, we’re getting closer! Baby steps! Look at you, pop music, you’re SO CLOSE!
SINCE WHEN IS BAE NOT SHORT FOR BABY
HAS IT BEEN THIS WAY THE WHOLE TIME?!